how long have I been in this storm?

So overwhelmed by the ocean's shapeless form... Water's getting harder to tread with these waves crashing over my head.

I love Lifehouse. That's their song Storm, by the way. I found it appropriate.

I'm out of thoughts to think. I'm sixteen, and I'm out of thoughts to think. Old ones keep replaying over and over in my head. Somebody please save me from this endless cycle.

I'm not sure what's wrong. I'm not sure if anything is wrong. But I'll talk about it anyway. Some of my friends have the life I've always wanted. One where you're surrounded by friends. And these friends aren't just people you hang out with; they're close. Really close. I watch them have fun, I hear the stories. Secretly, I want to be part of it. More than anything. Sometimes they include me, but never outside of school. I have to organize things outside of school. Maybe I'm working my way in. Maybe I'll be accepted into the group. Maybe I'll have an amazing summer. Maybe, just maybe... In a way though, it seems pathetic. I feel pathetic. Maybe they just feel sorry for me. I don't know. But I have to be optimistic. Someday, I'll have the life I've always wanted. Someday...

From the Sea of Monotony and Loneliness,
Calli